Human Traffic 2 Mostly Just Old People Staying In Bed All Day Sunday
London’s “naughtiest geezer”, Danny Dyer, has revealed that the plot for the eagerly anticipated sequel to Human Traffic is mostly just about old people staying...
Celeb
Mel B Now Selling Spice
Former Spice Girl Mel B has reportedly been caught in possession of an “extremely large quantity” of the illegal drug spice. According to reports, the...
Brian Harvey Advised Not To Take Kiki Challenge
Former East 17 singer Brian Harvey has been strongly advised against taking the Kiki challenge by a number of his closest friends. Harvey, who was...
Idris Elba Only Acting Like A DJ
In a shocking revelation from the dance music community, Idris Elba has admitted that he has been “only acting like a DJ” for the past...
Maradona Getting On It Highlight Of World Cup So Far
Footage of Argentinian legend, and arguably the greatest footballer of all time, Diego Maradona getting on it at Tuesday night’s match has been named as...
“Every Time I Click My Fingers… A Tech House Festival Launches”
Irish shit bag Bono has confirmed that every time he clicks his fingers, a tech house launches somewhere in the world. Speaking in his usual...
Cotton-Eye Joe Comes Out Of Hiding
Unconfirmed reports from the American deep south claim the illustrious Cotton-Eye Joe has finally come out of hiding. According to redneck Jebediah Jones, Cotton-Eye Joe,...
Green Velvet To Star In La La Land 2
Chicago dance music legend Green Velvet has astonishingly been cast to star alongside Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone in the eagerly anticipated La La Land...
CIA Uncover Plot To Spike Water At Kim Jong Un & Trump Meeting With MDMA
The CIA have reportedly uncovered a plot that would have seen all of the water at the Kim Jong Un and Trump meeting spiked with...
Deliveroo Driver Forgets Dip For Last Supper
Sources in Jerusalem have claimed the Last Supper has been ruined after an unnamed Deliveroo driver forgot to bring the dips. Reports suggest that a...
Trump To Use Honey Monster As Body Double For Kim Jong Un Meeting
Unconfirmed reports from Washington this morning suggest that President Trump may be planning to pull the wool over Kim Jong-Un’s eyes by using the Honey...
Stormzy Launches Line Of Tea Bags – Stormzy In A Teacup
UK grime sensation Stormzy is set to enter the world of caffeinated beverages with the launch of his very own line of tea bags, aptly...
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