Graham

A British teenager has reportedly spiked his recently divorced parents with pills in a last ditch attempt to see if they can patch things up. Martin Broadstone, seventeen, took advantage of his

A man whose boss told him to “come in today or don’t bother coming in tomorrow” has misinterpreted his boss’s threats and started to celebrate having two days off. Patrick Fitzgerald, known

A shocking statistic from the world of professional horse racing today has revealed that fifty percent of jockeys only participate in the sport for easy access to ketamine. The news has sent

A man who was left frantically searching for Secret Solstice festival tickets twenty-four hours before it was due to start has revealed that “he couldn’t believe it was sold out”. After trying, and

The WhatsApp group chat you are involved in with your friends is sure to descend into piss taking nonsense any second now. According to WhatsApp notifications, your friend Tony asked the group

An English teenager has been left devastated after discovering that being a “full time mad bastard” isn’t a real job. Peter Thornton, fourteen, has been left reappraising his options in life after

Signals currently being sent to your brain suggest that your entire existence is actually someone else’s K hole experience. Our info suggests that your entire life has actually been squeezed into a

According to our political sources, it appears that hipsters are about to become the UK’s latest scapegoat after last week’s decision to leave the EU completely eliminated the immigrant threat. Political scientist

In breaking news from the music industry, techno has today been officially declared “a bit too serious”. The declaration was made at this week’s annual Intelligent Dance Music Convention, or the IDMC,

A British citizen who was hoping to visit Berlin’s most exclusive nightclub, Berghain, this weekend has had his plans dashed after being refused entry to Germany at Berlin airport. Wes Feilding traveled