Argentinian electronic musician Guti has today surprised the music industry by announcing that he is to launch a rap career after kissing The Blarney Stone while in Ireland.
According to legend, anyone who kisses the stone, which is set in the battlements of Blarney Castle in County Cork, will instantly be blessed with the “gift of the gab” and eloquence in the skill of flattery.
Guti, who is visiting Ireland ahead of his eagerly awaited show in Dublin’s Opium Rooms this Friday, is said to have “ticked one item off his bucket list” by pressing his lips against the block of carboniferous limestone.
“Well actually my bucket list said ‘kiss Emma Stone’ but she’s going out with Spider-Man now and that probably won’t happen, I can’t compete with superheroes, so I decided to settle for the Blarney Stone instead,” explained Guti in perfect English with a captivating tone of voice. “I also had ‘visit Ireland’ on there so it’s been a good week bucket list-wise.”
“It definitely worked too,” he claimed enthusiastically. “I can already hear a marked improvement in my language and tone and my flattery skills are off the chart. I actually talked a nun out of her knickers last night, I always thought that was just something people said but if you’ve got the gift of the gab you can actually do it.”
“I’ve always wanted to be a rapper, it’s actually on the bucket list too, and now I finally have the confidence to do it,” he happily added. “So I’ve decided to add an element of rapping into all of the live shows I have scheduled for the next few months. It’s so exciting. I’ve also invited a number of American tourists who also kissed the stone to join me on stage in the Opium Rooms tomorrow night.”
Wunderground asked Melodic and Abstract, promoters of Guti’s Dublin gig, for their opinion on the artist’s sudden change of direction. They responded with, “Rapping? In Dublin? You’re joking right? He is in his bollix!”
According to sources close to Guti, the gift of the gab was not the only thing he got from The Blarney Stone after he woke up today with a number of cold sores on his lips.
If you’d like to see Guti and his cold sores rapping in Dublin this Friday you can check out the event information here.
