Today: March 10, 2026
May 11, 2015
1 min read

Dealer Talking About His Drugs Like He’s Got A Clue Where They Come From

Drug Dealer Talking About His Drugs Like He Knows Where They Come From

A local drug dealer is talking about his drugs like he has the slightest clue where they come from and what’s in them, it has emerged.

Adam Claxton, who lists his pastimes as “Playstation, money and creatine”, has reportedly been talking to a customer for the last fifteen minutes about the quality of his cocaine as if he hadn’t just picked it up in an unmarked generic bag.

“He espoused at length about how good the stuff is, how it was fresh off the boat and nothing like that damp stuff that he had last month,” explained 24-year-old weekend drug user Matt Winter who says that Adam will also make effort to try talk like he knows what’s in the drugs too. “He said that the slight burning it gives your nostrils is actually just a sign of how good the stuff is and not indicative of how much crap it’s been cut with.”

Other customers claim that Adam will often go to elaborate lengths to talk up the quality of his supply even though he doesn’t really understand how drugs are made or how the forces of international commerce that bring it from the source country to his work.


“He’ll say things like, ‘this is pure Colombian, like the stuff from Scarface’ and then try and just get you talking about Scarface to deflect from the shit coke that he has,” continued Matthew. “Usually if you express doubt that the stuff is any good he’ll swear to God that it’s the best stuff he’s ever done even though he’s now sworn to God that the stuff is the best every time you’ve ever bought anything off him.”

In a brief statement to Wunderground Adam claimed, “yeah this shit is top drawer, I know cause the bloke I get it off told me that the bloke he gets it off told him that it was fresh off the boat from Belize where they make all the best coke outta trees and chemicals.”

Matthew claimed that Adam routinely speaks about his drugs as if he was versed in their production techniques and he was a vital part of the whole process, and not just some small time cog in a vast narco-machine.

“He, like all dealers, asserts so much authority and supposed knowledge over his stuff even though he basically doesn’t even know how it’s made or where it comes from,” concluded Matthew. “He doesn’t even know what’s in the stuff he’s calling cocaine half the time.”

Previous Story

Nightclub Owner Insisting Music Stops Exactly At Closing Time “Just To Be A Prick”

Next Story

DJ Slaps Interviewer After Being Asked For “Craziest Story” For Millionth Time In Career

Latest from Blog

DJ kink adds air fryer to studio setup

Kink Adds Airfryer To Live Setup

Much-loved Bulgarian House & Techno act, Kink, has this weekend added a Bosch Air Fryer to his live setup. “I fucking love it!” said KINK. “You can literally do anything with this