A man in Surrey, England, who just sniffed a massive line of ketamine is said to be excited and slightly anxious but ultimately enjoying his last few minutes of sanity before the horse tranquilizer takes effect on his brain.
Martin Peterson, a 24-year-old bank clerk, is believed to be celebrating the “return of decent wobble” by taking “half gram lines and getting mangled”.
“We’ve not had any good ket around here in a long while,” claimed Martin moments ago. “So I’ve decided to jump back into it at the deep end and rack myself out a proper scary line. My tolerance is probably quite low at the moment so it could go either way, I’ll know in the next couple of minutes.”
“I always love this bit just before the ket kicks in,” continued the excited drug user. “I get butterflies in my tummy just thinking about the mind fuck of an inner brain adventure I’m about to go on but at the same time I like still being in control of my own thoughts for the last few minutes. I always try to get myself prepared by getting a can from the fridge and rolling a few ciggies. There’s no chance of me doing either of those things after it’s kicked in.”
Upon returning from the kitchen with a fresh beer Mr. Peterson had clearly started to succumb to the effects of the drug. We asked him if he was feeling any different, to which he replied, “Floooooommmph blllaaawwwwwgwwweee ssspppplllooooossssssh.”
After further prompting it became clear that Mr. Peterson was no longer with us as the only response he gave to questions was a blank stare and some low level groaning through a mouth which was now supporting an ever growing string of drool from its bottom lip.
Initial reports suggest that Mr. Peterson is enjoying his ketamine experience but it will not be known for certain until its effects wear off in about forty minutes time.
