An English teenager who was listening to Skrillex through headphones on a bus has reportedly turned his music up extra loud so everyone could tell how cool he is.
Daniel Fraser, a sixteen year old school dropout from Essex, was on the number seven bus between Clacton and Walton when the incident took place.
“When it comes to tunes, I always say turn it up or turn it off,” revealed Daniel earlier today. “I really don’t get people who don’t listen to their music so loud it hurts their ears. What’s the point in that? It’s stupid. You don’t go to a concert or a nightclub and listen to music turned half way up. You go and have the ears absolutely blown off you.”
“I was on the bus the other day, it was really packed, and I was listening to this amazing new Skrillex set that I found online,” explained Mr Fraser, with one hand stuck down the front of his tracksuit bottoms. “I was thinking to myself that this Skrillex set is pretty much the pinnacle of music, it’s never going to get any better, and I noticed that a lot of the other people on the bus weren’t listening to music at all so I thought if I turn my music up so loud that everyone else can hear it what I’m listening to, they’ll all think I’m really cool.”
“It worked too, once I turned the volume right up everyone was staring at me. There was even this one old chick, she must have been in her late twenties, and I could tell she wanted to fuck me by the way she was staring. If she hadn’t been so ancient she would have been in with a chance too. That’s the power of Skrillex mate.”
According to other commuters, their journey was ruined by “some little chav listening to absolute garbage”.
“I was on my way home from a long fucking day in the office when some little twerp sat down beside me and turned his headphones up so loud the entire bus could them,” revealed passenger Andy Stone. “It was horrible, I don’t know what he was listening to but it sounded like a cross between heavy machinery and someone scraping their nails down a blackboard. It was quite possibly the worst music I’ve ever heard. That little dweeb ruined what was otherwise a pretty peaceful journey.”
