More shocking news from Russia today indicated that there will be a complete ban on house music in the country. The legislation, which is to be introduced later this month, follows the tough stance Russia has recently taken against the gay community. The announcement comes after a number of known gay bars were raided by police this weekend, all of which were said to be playing house music.
Russian Minister for Misleading Acts, Afanasy Yorpantsov has denounced all house music and claimed that it has been a leading factor in the growth in gay and lesbian numbers seen in recent years. President Vladimir Putin has been pointing the finger of blame in every direction after opposition leaders claimed that the countless number of homoerotic images he has unleashed on the country’s youth during his time as president, like the one pictured above, are in fact the cause of Russia’s so called ‘problem’.
In a press release from minister Yorpantsov’s office it was claimed that, ‘Russia will be a safer place for your children without house music!’ And ‘House music is the devil’s work!’ While also stating that ‘Techno Viking is the perfect template for the Russian clubbing scene.’
An underground group, known as Comrades Unite for National Tyranny or CUNT, are calling for a less democratic solution to the issue and believe President Putin should be able to enforce any law he wishes without the backing of any other political colleagues, a group spokesperson said, ‘As CUNTs we believe that Putin’s word should be final, he is the number one CUNT in this country and we are now calling on all of the other CUNTs in Russia to stand with us!’
In other related news, there is to be a complete over haul of Russian Federation army and police uniforms, while builders, bikers, cowboys and Indians are to be banned from all public spaces due to the rising number of sporadic YMCA incidents.
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