Graham

The humble front porch was a surprise inclusion in this years DJ Mag Top 100 Places To Sleep After A Drunken Nigh Out poll. The front porch was beaten into the top

A man who accidentally drank piss on the last day of a festival has admitted that he was pleasantly surprised by the taste and refreshing qualities of the urea rich liquid. Patrick

Simon Powell, the world’s greatest stater of the obvious, has shocked no one with the unsurprising announcement that this year’s Glastonbury festival is going to be brilliant. The announcement was made during

A man who spent the entirety of a house party taking ketamine by himself has been labeled a “greedy cunt” by fellow party goers. House owner Alan Reilly has confirmed that the

Demitri Vegas and Like Mike have announced that they are attempting to sue the commercial music streaming website Spotify, claiming that no one is listening to their music on the site. The

A gabber fan has today launched a scathing attack on industrial techno by labeling the entire genre as “way too commercial” and suggesting that “only pussies listen to industrial techno nowadays”. The

The Greater London Authority has today announced plans that they are to implement a full scale hipster cull this coming autumn. The announcement comes after a number of local councilors came under

A drunk man has revealed that he stands to save a “small fortune” by taking full advantage of happy hour at his local bar. Steven Elliot, a twenty five year old from

Berlin’s Berghain nightclub has today announced plans to introduce a new minimalistic summer dress code in an attempt to save on their ever increasing air conditioning bill. The club, known for its

A local mad bastard has shocked his entire community by claiming that he regularly mixes drugs and alcohol and that the effects of the dangerous cocktail are in fact “brilliant”. Michael ‘Mad