Graham

Scooby Doo Exposes Ghost Producer As Meddling Record Label Executive

Scooby Doo and his traveling gang of mystery solving teenagers have exposed one of EDM’s most notorious ghost producers as a meddling record label executive. Thomas Anderson, head of recruitment at Diplo’s

March 13, 2015

The Neck Now Most Popular Place For Tattoos Among Unemployable Morons

A survey carried out by the International Tattoo Association claims that the neck is now the most popular place for tattoos among the world’s idiot population. The study, which also claims the

March 13, 2015

Hipster Pokes Out Own Eye With Sharp Edge Of Curled Moustache

A London hipster with an elaborately curled moustache has poked his own eye out in a bizarre dancing accident. The incident happened late yesterday evening in XOYO cocktail bar after hipster, Mitch

March 12, 2015

Ireland Declared “The New Ibiza” For Next 48 Hours

Ireland has officially been declared “the new Ibiza” after news emerged highlighting a loophole in Irish law which means that some narcotics, including ecstasy, ketamine and crystal meth are legal until midnight

March 10, 2015

Ibiza

Dad Shocked To See Band Play Electronic Music On Instruments

An English dad has been left shocked after seeing a live band play electronic music on instruments. Peter Smith was forced to sit down after witnessing a Royskopp set on Sky Arts

March 10, 2015

BREAKING: Ferris Bueller Calls In Sick After Ending Weekend Asleep In A Skip

Popular eighties coming of age movie character turned unpopular teenies mid-midlife crisis party animal, Ferris Bueller, has called in sick to work again after ending his weekend asleep in a skip. Bueller,

March 9, 2015

Man Taking Drugs All Weekend Blaming Night Terrors On “Too Much Cheese”

A man who stayed awake the entire weekend necking drugs has blamed the night terrors he experienced after finally going to bed at 5am Monday morning on “too much cheese”. Anthony James claimed the night

March 9, 2015

Bedroom DJ Hoping To Play In Kitchen Sometime This Year

A bedroom DJ from Edinburgh, Scotland, has made ambitious plans that will see him play in a kitchen sometime later this year. Barry McAllister, a music student at the Edinburgh College of

March 5, 2015

“You Definitely Still Would” Claims Man Watching Windowlicker Video For First Time

A man who was watching the music video for seminal Apex Twin track Windowlicker for the first time has claimed that he “definitely still would” bang one of the sexualised trolls from

March 5, 2015

World’s Biggest Derp House DJ Paris Hilton Googles “Derrick Carter”

Paris Hilton has today fired shots at Derrick Carter after the Chicago house legend went on a twenty four hour rant about the current state of the electronic music scene via a

March 4, 2015