The state of Colorado has announced a massive fifteen percent reduction in the popularity of EDM since the legalisation of Marijuana earlier this year.
Colorado’s Governor, John Hickenlooper, also announced major reductions in drugs offenses, violent crimes, sexual assaults and homicides, all of which “pale in comparison” to the reduction in EDM’s popularity according to the Denver based politician.
Martin Burrows, a music journalist and drugs enthusiast, spoke about the recently announced statistics, “It’s a great time to be alive in Colorado. 2014 will go down in history for being the year you were allowed to buy weed in a shop and also as the year EDM started to become unpopular, reinstating many people’s faith in humanity.”
“We’ve literally seen nobody bedecked in kandi or doing heart hands since we’ve legalised cannabis,” added Martin.
“Everybody knows that weed and music go together like ice cream and jello or London and knife crime,” claimed former hippy Burrows. “A spliff and a tune can be a wonderful thing with the weed really helping to enhance good music, but it can also help open our eyes to sub-par music like EDM or country and especially the satanic bastardisation of both that Avicii has inflicted upon the world.”
“Thankfully now that weed has been legalised more and more of the states young people will experiment with the herb and, with a bit of luck, they’ll realise just how bad EDM actually is, which is very bad indeed,” he hopefully continued. “If we’ve seen such a significant drop in such a short space of time imagine what we can achieve over the next couple of years. A world without EDM? Where David Guetta is a sous chef and throwing cakes at people is the reserve of certified clowns or food fights in 80s teen movies” he declared. “Who knows, all we can do is hope.”
Mr. Burrows also claimed that the reduction in EDM’s popularity has not been reflected in any other sector of Colorado’s music industry and suggested that it is in fact the opposite, with growth in the popularity of electronic music, rock, hip hop and “practically everything else apart from that shit” reported since the legalisation of marijuana.
The news from Colorado has led to a number of major anti-EDM groups, namely everyone about 18 with a sense of taste and working ears, across the United States changing their allegiances by becoming pro-weed groups in an attempt to achieve similar results to Colorado.
