With so many people idolising bands, musicians or DJs, it’s only natural that they will start to act in a way that is synonymous with their idols, for example, most David Guetta fans are complete wet blankets unable to get even the simplest of jokes. This causes similarities between people who are only linked by the type of music they like and allows us to place people in brackets based on nothing but our own judgmental thoughts, oh how we love book covers. Here’s a Stereotypical look at bands and their fans.
Mumford and Sons. These guys have gotten so big since their breakthrough album, Sigh No More, was released in 2009, they even closed the main stage at this year’s Glastonbury Festival. With Mumford’s total world dominance of the folk-indie scene it’s not surprising that they have so many fans but why do they all look like they’re taking a year off after finishing their fine arts degree? These guys are as hipster as you can get. I imagine they hang out in bars that are disguised as shitty tic-tac-from-the-not-to-distant-past museums, drinking made up cocktails out of empty Ragu jars, while discussing the best ways to curl one’s moustache.
Pantera. These guys were huge in the world of metal for over two decades, unsurprisingly they have a cult following as big as any other band to grace the genre and it’s very easy to spot them. From a distance they look like a rough bunch, dressed head to toe in black, including a t-shirt bearing a band slogan (most likely Metallica or Slayer) with the arms cut off, accompanied by flowing, shoulder length, black locks. Get a little closer and you’ll realise that these guys aren’t as much Hell’s Angles as they are angels, they’ll want to talk about anti fascism movements, alternatives to capitalism and which L’Oreal product makes their hair the shiniest.
Bob Dylan. Well what needs to be said about Bob Dylan? The man’s an institution, he has wrote some of the greatest songs of all time and even though he’s kind of lost his voice (did he ever really have one?) he still manages to tour and share his musical stories with the world. Despite all of this he still has some really douchebaggey fans. You know the type, they weren’t even born when Dylan was in his pomp. They just can’t comprehend liking anything that was made in their own lifetime because that’s what everyone else does. They’ll most likely have their guitar with them if you cross paths and after playing you the extended version of Hurricane, complete with forty two choruses, they’ll spend the next two and a half hours trying to convince you that anything made after 1974 just isn’t worth listening to.
Snoop Dogg. The self proclaimed father of rap has many fans all over the world. Mostly working class kids who are angry with the social structure they have been landed in, who feel they can relate their angst to the message that Snoop is sending to the man. I mean what says, ‘I’m angry and I want change’ better then, ‘Let the Bizzow Wizzow ride the tizzack.’ The problem is they don’t yet know the reason why they’re angry so instead of marching on city hall they spend their days hanging out in gangs on street corners, smoking hash and beating up people who are different from themselves in any way.
