“95% Of The Buttons On DJ Mixers Are Never Even Used” Claims Report

According to DJs and tech experts a reported 95% of the buttons on a typical mixer are going sorely unused by most users.

The average EDM DJ, according to the study conducted using video analysis of DJ sets, only uses “3% of the mixer’s capabilities” with even the most tech savvy EDM stars maxing out at around 10% of the buttons on offer.

“What we’re seeing among the new breed of DJs is that they’re only really concerned with syncing the track in and throwing their hands in the air,” claimed DJ expert Barry Huggins from DJing Magazine. “Other buttons and knobs just aren’t getting used anymore except by proper DJs playing good music but they’re just not marketable enough for us.”

Mixer manufacturers Pioneer have suggested that they may introduce a mixer model specifically for the up and coming breed of digital EDM DJs that will be “up to five times smaller with fewer buttons” and an added mic port so that “they and their buddies can each interrupt the flow of music to address the audience with cliched platitudes”.

“Most of the knobs, faders and buttons are just sitting there gathering dust and ketamine,” claimed Pioneer head of development Brandon Albright. “We could massively reduce costs by just getting rid of them. My mother always said that if something isn’t being used then you’re better off getting rid of it, that’s why there are no old board games, skateboards or action figures in my attic.”

Some DJs have suggested changing the function of the buttons on the mixer and replacing them with buttons more likely to be used like “a launch cake button, loop for 10 minutes while I run around on stage button and a foam cannon switch” while Calvin Harris has repeatedly asked for a kill switch that actually kills people, mainly audience members who talk back or give him shit.

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“I don’t know how many times I’ve looked at a mixer and thought ‘what the fuck does that do?'” asked Steve Aoki. “I’d be afraid to touch them in case I hit the wrong thing and accidentally turned the music off. It’d be better if those buttons weren’t there, who even uses a third and fourth channel?”

Reports have suggested that David Guetta is also keen on the idea of minimising the amount of unnecessary buttons on the mixer claiming that “wires are actually unnecessary too, I’ve performed hundreds of sets without even having my mixer plugged in”, before suggesting that we “get rid of mixers altogether and just have a set play out so we can dance around and then collect our money”.

Mr. Albright has said that Pioneer are currently hard at work developing the ultimate EDM DJ mixer which is expected to be released some time next year.