A school teacher was forced to intervene yesterday after a tour manager giving a career talk began explaining what his job actually involves.
The man had been invited to speak during “Bring Your Parent To School Day,” where children had already heard from a nurse, a firefighter, an accountant and one father who claimed to be “in crypto,” which staff later described as the morning’s first warning sign.
Things reportedly took a turn when the tour manager was asked what he does for DJs on the road.
“Well, I make sure the artist gets from the airport to the hotel, from the hotel to the venue, and then the rest of the week I spend chasing down bag on WhatsApp,” he explained, as the teacher began moving slowly sideways in front of the man.
The class initially seemed impressed as he described working in music, travelling the world and solving high-pressure problems in different cities. However, things took a tumble when one pupil asked what kind of problems.
“Sometimes the DJ forgets his USB,” said the tour manager. “Sometimes I have to hound the promoter for the correct rider. But mostly it’s just when the artist or more often, myself, has hoovered up all the ‘stuff’ and I have to try and figure out how to use my phone from the bottom of a K-hole so we can get some more rushed to the greenroom… stat!”
The teacher ended the session shortly after the man described his role as “basically a childminder on drugs.”
Parents have since been reassured that the children learned several valuable lessons about the music industry, including networking, communication skills, and how to do a bump off literally anything in a bathroom cubicle.
The tour manager has been asked not to return for Careers Week, although twenty-three children had already requested internships.
