Martin Garrix Happy To Be Paid In Blow Jobs “For Now”

Up and coming DJ, Martin Garrix, has said that he is happy to work for free as he is getting ‘plenty of blowjobs’ through his up tempo electrohouse sets.

Garrix, who has recently broken onto the EDM circuit in Europe and America, has played a number of high profile gigs this year. The seventeen year old DJ has yet to receive any monetary rewards for his performances with all payment entrusted to his mother until he turns eighteen, but has been the lucky recipient of a number of blowjobs, which he has accredited entirely to his mixing skills.

The young DJ spoke about his situation earlier today, “I’ve been playing some absolutely amazing gigs in some of the best clubs and most exotic locations in the world over the past year, it’s been such a great experience for me and I’m really grateful for it.”

“I’m still a pretty young guy and my mom gives me a really good allowance so I still have plenty of money for sweets and football stickers,” explained Mr. Garrix, “so the fact that I’m not being paid directly for my sets doesn’t really bother me too much and there are certain perks to the job that make up for the lack of money,” he continued with a smile.

“I’ve been playing these gigs for nearly a year now and in that time I’ve had more blowjobs then I can count,” he proudly claimed, “and that must be a really big number because I’m very good and counting and was always top of my class in maths.”

“I’m quite happy to keep playing for free as long as the skanks are still willing to suck me off,” he enthusiastically continued. “I guess I’m kind of a reverse prostitute, which is kind of ironic because, coming from Holland, most of the blowjobs I got before I started DJing were with actual prostitutes.”

“A couple of times when I’ve been getting a blowjob I‘ve asked myself ‘Martin do you think these hoes would be with you here if you weren’t a DJ?’” he honestly continued. “Then I answer myself ‘Of course not, they’re only here because they think that they’ll add a slight bit of relevance to their own pitiful lives by sucking a DJ’s cock’. It’s totally pathetic but hey a blowjob’s a blowjob.”