All the fun has fallen out of the party for 24-year-old Daniel Hume, after the person he was trying all night to score has left.
“Yeah, it’s gone downhill a bit now that that blonde girl who I was chatting up has left,” explained Daniel, who was hoping to get a least a mooch on his night out or, if really lucky, a shag. “While she was here I had a purpose and goal in mind, which was to make her laugh enough times that she decides ‘he’s funny enough to fuck’ and get her number.”
“But she left there a few minutes ago and now the party seems kinda pointless,” he added. “We said we’d add each other on Facebook so it’s not a total loss but the atmosphere has definitely changed.”
“I’ll probably just get locked with the lads now and go in on a bag of ket, just out of boredom really,” he added. “Unless of course someone else catches my eye, in which case I’ll make flirting with her the focus of the rest of the party in a hope that I don’t have to live such a lonely, pathetic life.”
Another party member, Jill, has also decided that the party has gone a bit shit after a dude she had her eye on passed out in an upstairs bedroom.
“Hopefully he comes back and rejoins the party at some point because we were getting along,” she explained. “There’s plenty of narcs left and someone just went on a booze run so I’ve no problem hanging around til he reappears.”
