A study carried out on the different effects that cocaine has on people has revealed that fancying someone and receiving free cocaine have an almost identical influence on the human brain.
The study, carried out at the University of Limerick, Ireland, investigated hormonal and chemical changes that occur in the brain when taking the drug and found that small doses, when free of charge, bore a striking resemblance to those seen in the brain when encountering lust or attraction.
“Free cocaine, like any free drug, has a far more significant effect on the brain than cocaine which has been paid for,” explained chief researcher Dr. Maurice White. “We knew this prior to carrying out this study, what we didn’t know, was that the effects it has on the brain are almost identical to those which occur when someone is attracted to another person.”
“The first similarity we noticed was a significant increase in Adrenaline and Norepinephrine,” continued White, who admitted carrying out the majority of the study’s tests on himself. “These hormones cause heightened senses and can result in things like sweaty palms and an increased heart rate, all of which are common during times of lust, attraction and receiving free cocaine.”
“Another common feature is the release of dopamines in the brain. This can cause light headedness and euphoria, which again can be caused by fancying someone or being given free coke,” he continued, while racking out an extremely large line of cocaine in preparation for another bit of stringent testing. “The Nucleus Accumben, also known as the brain’s pleasure center, becomes flooded with extra blood making contact with a person or free cocaine seem ten times more pleasurable than normal.”
“The final similarity needs a demonstration,” he said while stooping to sniff the extra large line of cocaine from a petri dish. “Now, as you can see, I’ve built a significant tolerance to cocaine, the line I’ve just taken is probably enough to kill a regular person, and, like you can build a tolerance to the drug, you can also build a tolerance to a person, becoming bored of them and no longer wanting to be around them, like annoying ex girlfriends or someone who seemed like an attractive girl when you were drunk but is really a forty five year old bloke.”
According to experts, the study’s finding are backed up by a recent statistic which revealed that at least fifty percent of the world’s one night stands are preceded by one of the party giving or receiving free cocaine and also explains why rich, ugly, old men are so successful at attracting aesthetically pleasing young women.
