It has been revealed that Terry and Sally Jones, from Leeds, England, are said to be “thrilled” that their twenty two year old son, James, has returned from travelling a far more “enlightened” person, without realising he is sky high on ecstasy.
Referring to their son as a “brand new man”, it is believed they think he has gained “valuable life experience” whilst visiting Thailand, Australia, Togo, Brazil and Argentina, when in reality it was “twenty four seven opium, marijuana, ketamine and ecstasy”.
“We can’t believe the change in him,” said a joyful Sally. “He finished university and didn’t really have any idea about what to do next. He was in a dead-end job, had a horrible girlfriend and had no direction. Since he got home, he has been completely different. He is happy to socialise with us, smiles a lot more and is willing to discuss things like politics, religion and culture, things I didn’t realise he knew anything about. He has a great aura.”
“It’s obviously worked wonders for my boy,” claimed Terry. “He has this new found confidence, like he is ready to take on the world. He got a degree in Sports Science so I hope he will take the bull by the horns, go out, and make a name for himself within the industry. We’re just so happy this has worked out.”
Wundergound managed to catch up with James to ask what he intends to do now he is back in Yorkshire, “I can’t even remember getting home,” laughed James. “For a year all I did was get fucked with strangers. It was all sex, drugs and weird food. All those drugs are still in my system now. I dread to think of the come down when it all begins to wear off and I realise I’m back home, in my mums house, with no job, no bird, no drugs and have to start from scratch. Fuck it, pass me a joint.
