Dutch DJ Afrojack has disgusted the entire music industry by admitting that he once played a full set in Magaluf’s BCM Planet Dance nightclub using only his penis to control the club’s in-house mixer.
Afrojack made the shocking revelation during an interview for an upcoming Channel 5 documentary called Parents Your Daughters Are Being Fucked In Magaluf. While documentary makers, ENDEMOL, claim the documentary is to highlight the cultural differences between the Spanish Island and British holiday resorts, the title and all of the content seem to suggest a “shock factor” style documentary which will draw attention to the island’s seedy and sordid side.
During his interview Afrojack claimed that he could have sex with “over twenty girls a night” giving each girl the “greatest four and a half minutes of their lives” while playing in the popular holiday resort, also known as Shagaluf.
“Magaluf is a great place for guys like me, who like to prey on young, drunk, impressionable, British chicks,” explained Afrojack during his interview which he insisted on giving topless. “Once I had a queue of at least twenty girls outside the DJ box who all wanted to have sex with me and I didn’t let any of them down. Luckily my average sex time is about exactly the same length as the bit in the middle of the track that I’m not mixing so all the sex didn’t affect my performance as a DJ at all,” he boasted.
“Another time I was fingering twins while playing. How cool is that?” he asked in a desperate attempt for approval before admitting that they guy twin “didn’t seem that into it”.
“I used my penis to control the mixer for that entire set,” he added.
When quizzed on how he managed to control a mixer with his penis Afrojack responded, “Well my mixing is quite basic and my penis is small enough to get in between all the knobs so I can mange it quite easily. I also have a lot of practice, I’ve enjoyed sensually rubbing my dick off mixers for years now – it’s why I have such good chemistry with my equipment and those cuts on my penis.”
BCM Planet Dance resident, Dale Smith, has labeled Afrojack as a “fucking scum bag”. Smith claims to have played after the Dutch DJ on more than one occasion, revealing that he often found the DJ box looking like “a 15 year old chronic masturbator’s bedroom” and smelling like “how I imagine Lindsay Lohan’s breath” smells after an especially heavy night.
