Dutch EDM DJ Afrojack is set to debut his latest DJ set at this year’s Edinburgh Fringe Comedy Festival.
The DJ is believed to have become disillusioned with the music industry, claiming he has to “work way too hard these days” and that he’s “sick of this shit”.
Wunderground caught up with the Dutchman earlier today, “The music game is so tiring man, I just feel like I need a bit of a break from the festivals, the fans and the lifestyle so I’ve decided to try my hand at something a little bit different this summer.”
“People have been telling me that I’m the laughing stock of dance music for years now, I’m no expert but I’m fairly sure that this means I’m a pretty funny guy, so I’ve decided to bring my DJ set to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival,” revealed the DJ, real name Nick van de Wall, “People are always pointing and laughing when they come to my shows, especially when I get on the mic, so I must be doing something right.”
According to Scottish funnyman Frankie Boyle, Afrojack’s DJ set is likely to “crash like a Royal in a French tunnel”.
“That neanderthal cunt won’t get a single laugh at the Fringe festival, I can guarantee that,” ranted Boyle. “People have been laughing at him for years, not with him, there’s a very big difference. When someone tells a good joke, you laugh with them but when someone falls and lands on their bollox you laugh at them, one is entertaining, the other is humiliating themselves and I don’t think the Edinburgh crowd are in the business of laughing at a millionaire dick weasel DJs humiliating himself.”
“His music and his DJing skills are definitely laughable, but none of it is actually funny,” continued Boyle. “If he wasn’t such a cretinous mutton head I’d actually feel sorry for him. Crashing on stage can be one of the worst things that can happen to a man, although, I’m not sure this fella has the brain capacity to be able to tell he’s crashing. He’ll probably just be oblivious in his smug bubble of cuntishness and think everything’s going well.”
Afrojack, pictured above trying to mix using only the very limited power of his brain, is believed to be preparing for his Fringe Festival debut by watching Wayans brothers’ movies, staring at a picture of Donald Trump’s hair and listening to Steve Aoki’s back catalogue.
