An alcoholic who tragically passed away late last night, revealed that his only regret in life was only buying six cans instead of eight earlier that day, moments before he died.
Peter McDonagh (56) died peacefully, but slightly sober, at his home in Wicklow, Ireland, where he was surrounded by his family and half a dozen empty cans of Carlsberg Special Brew.
We spoke with the deceased’s eldest son, Robbie McDonagh, earlier today, “It’s obviously a very sad time for us but it is comforting to know that he died with all of his family around him, he always said that he’d like to go out doing the one thing that he loved the most, which was drinking, unfortunately he’d finished his cans so he wasn’t actually drinking but he was still a bit drunk so at least that’s something.”
“My sister Tina actually had a couple of bottles of blue WKD in her bag, she loves a drink herself, and she offered them to him but he just mumbled something about how he’s rather drink dog’s piss and told her to fuck off,” revealed Mr. McDonagh. “About an hour after that he was gone, I think he’s gone to a better place now though you know? They say heaven is full of all the things you love but I doubt he got there so he’s probably down in hell with all his mates.”
“A couple of minutes before he passed he called me over and said to me ‘son, I only have one regret’,” continued the grieving Mr. McDonagh. “I thought he was going to say it was all the beatings he used to give us or the time he robbed two grand off me or the time he shagged me ma’s sister but he just said to me ‘I should have bought eight poxy cans today now I’m going to die bleeding sober’.”
According to reports, Mr. McDonagh’s funeral will take place at The Beloved Virgin Mary’s Chapel on River Road this Saturday and is a BYOB event.
