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September 9, 2016
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American Scientists Develop Anti-EDM Vaccination

Scientists in America are believed to have made a major breakthrough in the development of the world’s first anti-EDM vaccine.

According to Dr Petula Merriblossom, of the American Vaccines Association, a full vaccine for EDM could be available in America as soon as early 2018.

“Well it’s no secret that we’re having an EDM crisis here in America at the moment,” claimed Dr Merriblossom earlier today. “I feel that we’re at a bit of a tipping point at the moment and if we don’t do something about EDM quickly we could lose up to four, or even five, generations of American children to the cheap, cheesy bastardised version of dance music.”

“Thankfully, we’ve made significant strides in our development of an anti-EDM vaccine and we could be within reaching distance of a sustainable solution,” revealed Dr Merriblossom. “We’ve already started testing the vaccine on rats in our laboratory and so far all of the results have been positive, I really think that we could be onto a winner this time.”

Sources within the American Vaccines Association have revealed that the rats being used to test the vaccine have so far completely rejected all traces of EDM.

“We’ve seen some amazing results here in the lab,” claimed the Wunderground source. “The only negative results have been a couple of rat suicides due to prolonged exposure to David Guetta, but we’re confident that we can get those little creases ironed out before we start with the human trials.”

If the vaccine proves to be successful it could be made available for all American children between the ages of four and nine in early 2018. The vaccine will be optional and is expected to be requested by over ninety five percent of families.

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