Anklepants Exposed As Day Time TV Dickhead Jeremy Kyle

In quite possibly the most significant revelation of the year, the demented electronic music producer Anklepants has been outed as day time TV dickhead Jeremy Kyle.

Kyle, best known for his work in judging people less fortunate than himself, has revealed he created Anklepants in a bid to “break America” after his calamitous American TV debut The Jeremy Kyle Show was cancelled during its second season in December 2012.

He explained his bizarre shift from shit but weirdly compelling TV to shit but weirdly compelling music, “I was in a really bad place after the show got cancelled…Bradford. It’s a total shit hole.”

“I was moping around town feeling sorry for myself when someone shouted ‘Oi Kyle you dickhead, don’t you got nothing better to be doing than bad mouthing the likes of me for being a drug addict? Have you got any spare change?'” at me in the street,” recounted the lizard like TV personality famed for his piercing stare, lack of any qualifications that warrant his position and obsessing with licking golfballs. “Needless to say I didn’t give him any money, but something inside me really changed that day,” he continued.

“I realised I did have better things to be doing with my time than spending it with pond scum like him, much better things!” claimed Kyle smugly. “I’ve spent a large portion of my adult life associating with the lowest level of society, really scraping the bottom of the barrel. During that time those plebs have constantly called me a dickhead, if being a dickhead is what makes me better than them then I’m proud to be a dickhead,” he announced resiliently.

“I think it was when I came to terms with my dickheadedness that Anklepants was born.” claimed Kyle. “I’m surprised it’s taken people so long to figure it out, I had the animatronic cock for the headpiece made especially for that reason. I just presumed people would have seen the head and the dick, put one and one together and got Jeremy Kyle.”

“The music which I’ve been producing is also supposed to be an interpretation of my voice and the things I say,’ he revealed. “So when I’m making non musical, harsh and random noises, I could just as easily be carping toothless Joe from Stoke about not wearing a johnny. They’re both equally as annoying and quite a good likenesses if I do say so myself.”

“I really want to make it big in America and there’s no easier way to do that at the moment than being a novelty EDM act and so far it’s working well, I’m already more famous stateside as Anklepants than I ever was as Jeremy Kyle,” he happily explained, “and I no longer have to be worried about whether I’m coming across as a bit of a dickhead because being a dickhead is my thing now.”

Anklepants, labelled by many as the most annoying thing in electronic music since DJ Sneak joined Twitter, has indicated that he intends to do a collaboration with Paris Hilton, where he will actually fuck the gormless cretin with his animatronic cock in an attempt to increase their rank in this year’s DJ Mag Top 100 popularity contest.