Graham

The London Underground, more commonly known as the Tube, is now London’s only surviving underground scene. Stuart Holden, a spokesperson for the London Underground Night Gang Society or LUNGS, claimed that the

The Netflix original movie XOXO portrays “a great reflection of club culture”, according to a fifty eight year old critic who has never stepped foot inside a nightclub. Writing for the Santa

Ronald McDonald, the face of global fast food chain McDonald’s, has accused BBC Radio 1 DJ Annie Mac of identity theft. According to Mr McDonald’s legal representative, Frank Oliver, the DJ, real

A miserable DJ who claims mobile phones at raves are “total vibe spoilers”, has confirmed that he believes “phone theft in clubs helps improve the dance floor”. DJ Moan Ekunt, an aspiring

Japanese car manufacturers Toyota have announced that they are set to launch a techno hatchback, that will only be available in black, called the Carola. According to Toyota, the car will have

In a last bid to ostracise the entire clubbing community, Berlin techno institution Berghain is set to change it’s name to “Don’t Even Bother Trying or DEBT”. According to Berghain hierarchy, they

A depressed alcoholic in Liverpool, England, has revealed that he is definitely more of a glass half empty type of person. Martin Mellor made the admission in his local pub, moments after

Reports from Germany indicate that a man licking another man’s bumhole is now considered high culture after a recent court hearing found that the city’s infamous techno-sex cauldron, Berghain, produces work of

The latest report from the International Drugs and Alcohol Association, or the IDAA, has confirmed that heroin is, in fact, great for taking the edge off. IDAA spokesman Pete Doherty claims that

According to Wunderground sources, God has been hospitalised after accidentally snorting chemtrails at the tail end of a “holy water binge”. It is believed that God had been drinking holy water for