Reports from Germany indicate that a man licking another man’s bumhole is now considered high culture after a recent court hearing found that the city’s infamous techno-sex cauldron, Berghain, produces work of cultural significance and should therefore pay a lower tax rate.
The ruling was made after the court decided that Berghain should fall under the same tax bracket as theaters, concert halls and museums rather than a normal entertainment venue.
“Berghain clearly isn’t a normal entertainment venue,” claimed Berghain’s legal representative Willy Fuchs. “I don’t know about you, but I’ve never been to a normal entertainment venue where you can see a man with his tongue so far up another man’s bumhole he can taste what he had for lunch so we simply can’t classify it in the same bracket as somewhere like a cinema or sports arena.”
“Anyone who has ever been lucky enough to make it through those hallowed doors will tell you that it’s much more of a psychological experience than an entertaining one,” continued Mr Fuchs. “There’s nothing entertaining about two men riding each other like it’s the last day of rodeo season, unless you’re one of the men of course, it’s a far more serious business than simple entertainment, it’s a matter of national culture and it should be offered the same protection as other culturally significant things.”
“For me, nothing quite says ‘Germany is great’ like two guys playing hide the bratwurst and it’s about time man on man action was recognised for what it really is. Now we should all celebrate the fact by giving each other rimjobs.”
According to German publication Der Spiegel, the latest ruling may open the door for all homosexual couples to apply for tax grants, similar to those received by artists, authors and musician. Although, to be eligible, they may need to agree to “suck each other off in public” at least once a week.