Graham

A number of hardcore London clubbers have been forced to employ the help of psychics to find tickets for the monthly ABODE party, held in Greenwich’s Studio 338, it has emerged. Tickets

Claptones all over the world have been placed under protective custody after their numbers plummeted to an all time low earlier this year. Although the exact source of Claptone life on this

Following in the government’s footsteps, English drug dealers have announced that they are set to introduce a 5p baggie levy, with immediate effect. The decision was made at last weekend’s Annual Drug

A successful drug dealer from Wichita, Kansas, has apparently approached a number of advertisement agencies about selling advertising space on the baggies he uses to package his product. Lil’ Jonesy, real name

It has emerged today that London based electronic music producer and former ankle model Skream is set to dramatically drop pants and perform naked in an attempt to raise money to build a charity

A recent study carried on a market research focus group has revealed that Red Bull gives you wings but magic mushrooms make you fly. According to market research mogul, Martin Ainsley, panel

A New York drug addict who traveled to Ireland to sample the “famous Irish craic” has been left disappointed after discovering nothing but mediocre cocaine on the streets of Dublin. Anthony Barber,

Shouting drunk abuse at people in the streets has been declared the official number one pastime of all local knobheads. The news was announced at this week’s annual Knobheads Convention which takes

A clubber who appeared on Channel 4’s popular daytime TV show Countdown is said to be delighted after getting a few Es and some K. Mitch Adams, thirty two, lived out one

Swiss based watch manufacturer Rolex have recalled a batch of pills which apparently cause time to slow down. The pills, which are blue and are emblazoned with Rolex’s crown logo, are believed