Today: March 4, 2026
October 25, 2016
1 min read

Bear Grylls To Bring Samsung Galaxy Note 7 Into Jungle For Starting Fires

TV survival expert Bear Grylls has announced that he is to replace his trusted flint striker with a Samsung Galaxy Note 7 for an upcoming trip to the jungle.

According to Grylls, the Galaxy Note 7 is now the best fire starting device available on the market and will become this century’s “must have survival tool”.

“It’s a definite game changer,” claimed Grylls during a chat with Wunderground earlier this week. “I like to plan my survival expeditions in areas with good wifi reception and readily available Starbucks coffee so having a device that you can use to stream your favourite television programmes and start fires with is a real mark of modern day survival.”

“Up until now, I’ve been using a flint striker and a knife to start fires,” revealed Grylls. “They’re good, but, as you’ll know, flint strikers are no good for checking your Facebook, the Samsung Galaxy Note 7 gives me the best of both worlds. I can literally Tweet about how cold the jungle is, then leave my Note 7 down on a pile on dry leaves, bark and small twigs and, boom, two minutes later I’ve got a fire.”

“The only problem is getting them into the jungle,” continued Grylls, best known for drinking his own piss out of a cup made from a kangaroo’s penis. “We’re not allowed to bring them on flights any more so I suppose I’ll just have to arrange my next trip to a jungle that’s within walking distance of a Carphone Warehouse.”

Reports suggesting Grylls would be made the “new face of the Galaxy Note 7” have been proved false after Samsung announced a new partnership with The Prodigy’s Keith Flint earlier today.

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