A young David Guetta fan from Austin, Texas, is said to be extremely confused and frustrated as to why everyone in the world is not a David Guetta fan.
Madison du Plant(16), considers listening to Guetta’s music as one of her top five hobbies, along with fantasising about being stuck in an elevator with One Direction, taking selfies, talking about how ugly some of the other girls in her class look in selfies and “just being happy that [she’s] white”.
“I just don’t get how you can’t like David Guetta’s music,” claimed a dumbfounded Ms. du Plant. “It literally has everything, easy to remember lyrics so you never forget the words, simple melodies that make it easy to hum along and that bit in all the songs that goes ‘na nana nanana nanananana nananananananana boooooooosh!’ What more could you want from music?” she asked defiantly.
“All the people my age like David Guetta, it’s just all these old farts who don’t even get what music is about that don’t like him,” claimed an angry Madison. “Music’s about PLUR. Progressive, Lovely, U-ro, Rave. Just like David Guetta,” continued the confused teenager. “All the best EDM bands are U-ropean,”
Ms. du Plant is also said to be extremely frustrated by the number of “haters hating” on Mr. Guetta and believes that if everyone gave the French EDM superstar’s music a chance they would soon be won over by its charms.
“I wish everyone would just listen to his music and stop hating on him,” continued Ms. du Plant hopefully. “Then people would see how good he really is and you’d never have to worry about crappy old music like Arcade Monkeys or Arctic Fire coming on the radio and spoiling your mood.”
David Guetta, pictured above showing friends how strong he is by holding a pair of Beats headphones in one hand, is believed to be thankful that he has loyal fans like Madison. A source close to the Frechman revealed Mr. Guetta “loves each and every one of his fans” while pointing out that the voting for the DJ Mag Top 100 poll is open and that he hopes to “see them all as ticket paying, merchandise buying members of the audience at one of his shows soon”.
That describes everyone quite well! 😛