Mousehead-wearing EDM star Deadmau5 has dramatically signed on for a starring role in inexplicably popular American reality TV series, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, according to US gossip-hole, TMZ.
Joel Zimmerman, known as much for his stupid headgear, acerbic public persona and nerdiness, as for his music, joined the cast last week after the family attended one of his show’s in Burbank, California where the DJ took an immediate liking to Kendall Kardashian – with the two reportedly sharing “a molly” in the toilets before leaving the club in his Ferrari.
“Kim totally shat the bed, sure she hangs out with Paris Hilton at regrettable EDM posing opportunities but she doesn’t want her sister involved with a skinny guy with tattoos and bad teeth,” claimed a source. “She’s furious.”
Producers of the hit show are reportedly delighted at the burgeoning relationship and are keen to keep it going by paying the couple to stick together and assuring them that the crossover exposure will be good for both Deadmau5’s and Kendall’s career, whatever that is.
“He’s a great addition to the show, he’s mouthy, confrontational, famous for not doing very much,” claimed an unnamed exec. “He’s perfect, plus his head is extremely large – he’s like part of the family.”
“Deadmau5 and Kim are clashing heads, both over the Kendall affair and because she’s jealous that even though Deadmau5’s head is a prosthetic fake – like Bruce’s – it’s still smaller than the rest of the family’s heads,” added the exec.
The feud between Deadmau5 and Kim is said to have escalated after it emerged that the older sister verbally forbade younger sister Kendall from becoming involved with the EDM DJ and called him a fat-headed twerp.
A source claims that Kim told Kendall not to let things get too serious, “to enjoy the exposure of standing behind a famous DJ in the booth” and to be seen “in Ibiza drinking expensive champagne” because it’s a known way to help a model’s career.
Reports from the set claim that Kim then “threw a glass of Evian slave tears into the face of Deadmau5 after the DJ was trying to defend Kendall, although he was wearing his mouse head at the time so the water just bounced off,” continued the source. “Kim was naturally furious that she didn’t inflict any wetness on Deadmau5’s face so did the only natural thing she could, something even you or I would do, she shat in his helmet.”
It is believed that Deadmau5 unknowingly wore the helmet on stage before realising that it was filled with starlet shit when a dollop of it landed on the play button of his mixing desk – causing the mix to immediately stop.
As an act of juvenile revenge it is understood that Deadmau5 and Kendall sought payback against Kim by dousing her thick black locks in high strength peroxide, rendering her completely blonde – a fact which has been evidenced by the curvy star’s dramatic new blonde look.
“I can’t wait to see what happens next,” concluded the excited producer. “Kim is pretending she went blonde on purpose and isn’t absolutely seething that because of Deadmau5’s shenanigans she now looks like a cross between Christopher Walken and Draco Malfoy on botox.
