Rumours emerging from Hollywood suggest that DJ Sneak has been asked to play Jabba the Hutt in the next installment of the Star Wars franchise.
Sneak, best known for being an insufferable man child and mediocre DJ, famously featured as Slimer, the lovable ghost, in the 1984 hit movie Ghostbusters but has not featured in an acting role since.
Movie director and super nerd JJ Abrams claims that Sneak is the ideal candidate for the roll for a number of reasons.
“He’s definitely the perfect man for the job,” explained Abrams. “Movies these days, particularly science fiction, depend way too much on special effects. Pretty much everything you see has been recorded using a green screen and characters have to undergo lengthy make up processes before filming even starts, nothing is real.”
“Bringing Sneak on board as Jabba the Hutt completely changes that,” revealed Abrams. “He’s already nailed the look, all he’ll have to do is get into a body suit and he’s ready to start shooting. The last Jabba the Hutt was actually played by a cow with a fat baby strapped to its back and you know what they say, ‘never work with children or animals’ so Sneak should be a breath of fresh air.”
“Although, it’s more than just the look with this guy,” continued Abrams. “Everybody knows that Jabba is a grumpy old cunt of an alien and everyone who’s ever met Sneak, or seen him on Twitter, knows that he’s a grumpy old cunt of a man, they’re a match made in heaven, if it was up to me, I’d give Sneak his own spin off show, it would be a chat show, set in the Star Wars universe, where Jabba would interview celebrities from all over the galaxy, a bit like The Ellen Show, only more believable.”
DJ Sneak has yet to confirm whether he will be accepting the offer to appear in the latest Star Wars movie but he has stated that he will give a response once he finishes blocking people on Twitter.
