After participating in a conversation outside a bar in Playa d’en Bossa, Ibiza, two holiday goers were said to believe that the man they bought tickets from was “definitely their friend” and not only “after their money”.
Dave and Laura Spencer, of Bournemouth, England, were said to be “undecided” on what night to attend on the White Isle, when nineteen year old Ash Jones, jumped into the conversation, offering his “expert opinion” on the matter.
“We usually try to avoid ticket sellers but this lad seemed genuine,” announced Dave. “We didn’t know if we should go to Sankeys, Space, Ushuaia, Privilege, Pacha or Amnesia, but Ash recommended Pacha. He said even though it was ninety euros to get in, whereas the others were thirty, it would definitely be the better night. He was really nice; asking where we were from and telling us where to get drugs. He asked what hotel we are in and said to keep in touch. A proper friendly bloke.”
“We told him we didn’t like deep house or techno and was looking for something with big drops with a bit of an EDM party style,” Laura told us. “So he pointed us towards the Solomun event as some bloke called Richie Hawtin was on the lineup. I’d never seen either of them in the UK pop charts but he said it was definitely up our street. Sadly, he lied and we left after an hour. It was shit. It was like one song playing the whole time, no drops and no party atmosphere. Just loads of messy cunts, overdosing on too many drugs, dancing to the music. Where was the cake throwing? Why was the DJ staring at his decks when he could be stood on them? We like drugs, but not extreme amounts. We couldn’t wait to get out.”
Wunderground spoke to Ash regarding his role in the sale “To be fair, it wouldn’t be right of me to advise they end up at some shit EDM event, even if that’s where they asked to go” he confirmed. “Solomun and Hawtin is a sick lineup; hopefully it taught them about good music and real Ibiza vibes. The fact that tickets were double the price of anywhere else is a bonus for me as I earn more commission from it. I definitely ain’t a shifty fucker stealing from their pockets with a monsoon of lies; but I know I am on the wrong side of the fence of integrity. Let’s face it, in Ibiza, who isn’t?”
