“I’ve Finally Got My Satisfaction” Reveals An Aging Benny Benassi
Italian DJ Benny Benassi has today revealed that he has has come to the end of a decade long search for his satisfaction after finally becoming completely and utterly satisfied.
The aging producer has admitted that he had been looking in all the wrong places for satisfaction and that it was only when he started to enjoy the simpler things in life that he became aware of what true satisfaction was.
He spoke to Wunderground earlier, “I had been looking for satisfaction for so long, sometimes I wondered if I would ever find it.”
“For years I’ve been asking people to touch me and then just push me till I can get my satisfaction,” explained Benassi in his best pidgin English, “but that doesn’t work and there’s only so much touching and pushing a man can take before he starts to feel like a button, which is even more unsatisfactory than I was to begin with.”
“I even went to one of Silvio Berlusconi big booby bukake bonanzas but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn’t get no satisfaction,” he continued with overly dramatic use of his hands. “I know exactly how the Rolling Stones must have felt,” he added.
“The last couple of years I’ve mellowed a bit, I’ve swapped drugs and partying for a nice, comfortable pair of slippers and instead of big round titties I enjoy a nice round glass full of Chianti and instead of rim jobs I’ve got my index finger and a tube of hemorrhoid cream,” he said with a hint of satisfaction. “I realise now that it is the simple things in life that make you happy, maybe I’m just getting old but at least I’m finally satisfied.”