It has today been revealed that the wax figurine of popular EDM hairdo David Guetta that sits in Madame Tussauds in London is actually “a more accomplished DJ” than David Guetta himself – despite being an inanimate object.
Staff at Madame Tussauds have witnessed the statue, noticeable in the above picture by its dead, lifeless eyes, playing to rapt audiences of tens of people performing all of David’s DJing tricks like looking like David Guetta and standing there doing nothing while music plays.
Fans have been travelling from around the globe to witness the wax statue as it stands behind some unplugged decks with its hands in the air playing Guetta music that has been piped in from a back room iPod claiming “it’s just like seeing the real thing except somehow more true to life because there’s no false pretense that the DJing is real”.
“I’ve been fifteen times to see it,” gushed one fan who says that the only thing that differs from real life is that the statue doesn’t smell of hair products and ill-gotten cash like David does, but that is just as available to pose for self-serving photographs while pretending to DJ. “Each time I come back it’s the same set of money spinning EDM-lite electro house, which, despite becoming largely irrelevant as early as 2008, is just like a real David Guetta set.”
“It doesn’t beat match or read the crowd but it doesn’t need to, it’s an inanimate statue of David Guetta – not Sven Vath,” he added.
Staff at Madame Tussauds have claimed that it’s probably the most realistic figure they’ve ever displayed – seconded only by the wooden figure of Keanu Reeves and the statue of Prince Charles that sneers openly at the customers.
“We’ll probably bring in more DJ wax figures now and make our own little Tomorrowland festival right here in the museum,” concluded a Tussauds spokesperson. “It’ll be exactly like the real Tomorrowland except vastly cheaper and, because we control the iPod, better music.”
This is golden 😀