A man who posted on number of feminist status updates on Facebook is hoping that they will get him “some pussy” in the near future.
Ryan Allen, a twenty year old student from Cardiff, has admitted to being a “secret male chauvinist” and using feminist status updates as a way of impressing classmates.
“I first learned that you could use feminism as a way of pulling birds when I accidentally attended a FemSoc meeting in first year,” explained Ryan, a multimedia undergrad. “The room was packed with chicks, most of them were a bit minging but luckily some of them were half decent and I’m not exactly picky.”
“At the end of the meeting loads of girls came over and congratulated me on being brave enough to show my true feminist feelings,” continued Mr. Allen. “The only reason I stayed for the whole thing was because I heard there’d be free pizza at the end but I could tell straightaway that these meeting were an untapped pussy goldmine. I haven’t missed one since.”
“I’m trying to broaden my horizons now,” claimed Ryan. “I’ve been adding a lot of girls on Facebook from various Feminism Societies in different universities all over Britain and I’m posting a lot of different status updates to let them all now how feminist I am.”
“To be honest with you, I just look up Lady Gaga quotes and post them,” he admitted, “but it seems to be working, I’ve been getting lots of likes and some of the girls, who I’ve never even spoke to, are messaging me and saying how much they’r love to meet up. I’m hoping to have a network of feminist booty calls built all over the country by the time I get my degree.”
According to Jones, other ways he has impressed girls on his Facebook include, cat videos and pictures, videos of babies laughing, status updates displaying fake emotion and pictures of his cock.
