A young ketamine user, clubber and tattooed gimpster, has had his entire bag of ketamine horsed by several friends at a party after he offered a bump to people as an empty gesture hoping they wouldn’t accept.
“I was just trying to fit in and come across well so I offered my mate Kev a bump which was overheard by Sam who made a face like he would like some,” claimed 23-year-old lifelong graphic design intern and casual drug user Brian Thompson. “So not wanting to be a stingy prick I told him to work away and have one too.”
“He didn’t seem all that impressed with my generosity and by this point there were a few more ears pricking around the room so I just magnanimously said ‘sure work away on it, make sure everyone gets a bump’ thinking that they’d say no or that they had their own,” continued Brian.
“But every fucker there rinsed into it, some of them even used their own spoons,” he continued. “Dave was the last to use it and I know for a fact that he had his own. It was just an empty gesture, not one that was supposed to be taken at face value, sort of like satire or parody, I was parodying a generous dude.”
Brian claims that watching the bag being passed from person to person was akin to seeing your female daughter be ogled by a group of leering footballers or a game of pass the parcel where you never win.
“In the end when I got the bag back there was about enough for two bumps left, and there’s no other good shit around,” he concluded, while licking the remnants from the bottom of the bag. “Plus nobody even acknowledged how absolutely sound I am, like they don’t even care about being nice, only ket.”
