Australian EDM duo Nervo have pulled out of their hometown Stereosonic gig in Melbourne just hours before the show claiming that a dingo ate their mixer.
Sisters Miriam and Olivia Nervo played at both Stereosonic Adelaide and Brisbane earlier this weekend, where they were warmly received by the hoards of tweaked up meat heads and generic fluffy-boot clad disco whores that attend the festival.
Nervo’s decision to pull out of Melbourne show was announced earlier on the pairs official Facebook profile in a statement that read, “Sorry guys wont be able to play Stereosonic Melbourne tonight, flaming dingo ate our mixer. Soz everyone we’ll be back real soon.”
Dr. David Fitzpatrick, an excuses expert from the University of Sydney, has criticised the sisters last minute withdrawal from the festival, “I’ve been analyzing excuses for years now and I can tell you that Nervo’s excuse is a sorriest excuses for an excuse I’ve ever heard.”
“The dingos ate my blank has been a popular excuse here in Australia since the 1980s,” continued Dr. Fitzpatrick. “I guess it would be the equivalent of saying your granny died or you’ve got diarrhoea, people know you’re bullshitting but they can’t question you without running the risk of looking like a bit of a cunt.”
“It’s most commonly used for things like babies and homework. This is the first time I’ve ever heard it being used about a piece of electronic equipment,” explained the Doctor. “But in reality dingos don’t possess anywhere near the jaw power that would be needed to munch through a sophisticated bit of gear like a mixer, they’re just dogs at the end of the day.”
“If I was to properly analyze the excuse the girls gave I’m almost certain that drugs would be the root cause of their excuse making,” surmised Dr. Fitzpatrick. “Although that’s not surprising at all since it’s scientifically proven that drugs are the root cause of ninety percent of excuses made by people in the 19 to 35 year old age bracket.”
