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June 10, 2015
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Nights Out Now Last Three Days Discovers Man Who Went To First Rave

Nights Out Now Last Three Days Discovers Man Who Went To First Rave

A young man who attended his first rave last Friday has discovered that nights out now last three days.

“Before I got into the clubbing scene I thought that nights out were just that nights out, you’d go for a few drinks, head to a club, finger someone on the dancefloor, eat a takeaway then go home,” explained Francis White. “But that sort of night out now, which would have been epic in my student days, now feels like a quiet evening at home watching Question of Sport, eating Wotsits and wanking.”

Francis says that now, since he’s been on the clubbing scene, his nights out are spread across the entire weekend only finishing up in the early hours of Monday.

“Now I go out to a DJ set on a Friday, bang a few pills then head to an afterparty until the morning, after which point we might go to an early house or back to a mates place to continue the party,” he explained. “Then when Saturday night rolls around it’s back off to another gig to do it all over again and then Sunday it’s the same thing.”

Francis claims that this happens basically every time he leaves his house on Fridays and is likely to continue to happen til his liver fails or he has kids, whichever comes first.

“It’s great, I mean it’s tiring and I’ll be a zombie til Thursday but once Friday comes back around I feel normal enough to do it all over again,” he concluded. “There’s now no such thing as a few quiet drinks, any night out invariably ends in a three day bender.”

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