American President Barack Obama has today revealed that he plans to “do a season in Ibiza” next summer.
Obama, who recently confessed to being an Avicii fan, is expected to quit politics altogether when his second term as president finishes later this year.
“I’ve been in politics for almost thirty years now and I feel there are certain aspects of life that I’ve missed out on because of it,” Obama told Wunderground earlier. “Don’t get me wrong, I’ve enjoyed every bit of the ride so far and being a politician and feeling like you’re making a difference to the world is really rewarding, financially, but I’ve never been able to just cut loose and enjoy myself, that’s why I’ve decided to ditch my family and move to Ibiza for the season next year.”
“I haven’t really thought about what I’ll do over there yet but it definitely won’t be anything to do with politics, that ship has sailed for me now,” continued the charismatic American. “I’m not that picky about jobs really, I just don’t want to have to sell tickets on the beach or be a PR on the West End, but once I can get guest list for everywhere I’ll do pretty much anything.”
“Ideally, I’d like to get a job in one of the big clubs but I’ve heard they’re pretty hard come by so I’ll probably just end up selling a bit of gear.” revealed the President. “That would suit me better because I’ll be my own boss and if I want to sit up all day and all night hammering slugs of ket then that’s fine. I’ve also got a really good CIA contact in Barcelona who gets some primo-white straight from Peru so there’s a few bucks to be made, maybe even enough to fuck off to Thailand for the winter.”
Sources close to Obama have confirmed that the president has already started to build a collection of longline vests, luminous swimming shorts, white ankle socks and snapback caps in preparation for his season in Ibiza.
