A performance by Richie Hawtin under his Plastikman persona was forced to be cut short as it became over run with angry environmentalists.
Hawtin has been playing for years under the Plastikman banner without ever encountering any issues before last night’s show. The performance began as expected but 20 minutes in things had to be cut short amidst protest and rioting by members of environmentalist movement, Greenpeace.
An eyewitness claimed, ‘A bunch of poorly dressed people in tye-died t-shirts began rushing to the front of the stage whilst booing and throwing sods of turf.’
A Greenpeace spokesperson submitted that Hawtin’s Plastikman persona is bad for the environment as it promotes the use of a non-biodegrable substance, ‘We think that it’s irresponsible for an artist like Richie to continue to recycle this Plastikman idea.’
‘I have nothing against the music but there are impressionable teens who’ll see Plastikman and think “Oh plastic is cool, let’s go use plastic six pack rings to strangle some dolphins.” It’s a natural progression.’
Hawtin, in typically conciliatory fashion has offered to perform an exclusive acoustic set for Greenpeace’s annual convention later in the summer. ‘I’m going to go acoustic. I’m like Bob Dylan backwards, ‘enthused Hawtin. ‘It’s going to be wild. I’ll be performing all of Decks, FX and 909 using only a bongo, a triangle and a xylophone. We’re calling it Cardboard Man. I can’t wait.’
