Defected label boss Simon Dunmore has reportedly been spotted leaving a London branch of Claire’s Accessories with six bags of “sparkly bits”.
Rumours suggest that Dunmore visited the Walworth Road shop in preparation for this Saturday’s Glitterbox takeover in the nearby Ministry of Sound nightclub.
According to Claire’s sales assistant Gina Styles, Mr. Dunmore bought “enough accessories to pimp out half of Essex” and only stopped shopping because he couldn’t carry anything else.
“I’ve not seen a man buy that many sparkly bits since Gary Glitter cancelled his loyalty card,” claimed the sales assistant. “Since then, apart from the odd visit by Prince Philip, we don’t really get that much custom from men so it was nice to have a bloke walking around the shop for a change.”
“He said he needed to glam a load of boring old DJs up for some concert thingy that’s on around the corner,” continued Ms. Styles, a fully trained accessory engineer. “So he’s pretty much just grabbed a handful of everything and threw it into his basket, exactly the same way Kerry Katona shops when she’s in Greggs.”
Sources within Defected have confirmed that Dunmore has enlisted the help of world famous drag queen RuPaul to ensure the Defected crew reach their full glam potential at this weekend’s party.
“We’re doubling Glitterbox in Ministry up with our Defected Christmas party,” confirmed Dunmore. “We’re having a tranny-Christmas theme so naturally we’ll be styling ourselves entirely on Sharon Osbourne’s look. We’ve got RuPaul coming in to give the lads a hand with their makeup and I’ve already sorted all the accessories so we’re pretty much good to go.”
“I’ll have this crew looking like a mix between a Geordie Shore photo shoot and a cheap Christmas tree in no time.
If you’d like to get glamorous with Simon and the rest of the Defected crew at Ministry of Sound this Saturday you can pick up tickets here.
