Skrillex has today vowed to ‘make Hollywood pay’ after the announcement that Ben Affleck is to play Batman in the next installment of the DC Comics’ superhero movies.
Skrillex, a self confessed ‘Batmanaholic’, was outraged by the announcement and took to Twitter to express his feelings, “WTF! BEN AFFLECK! This is too much, how could they do this to the Caped Crusader? I’m going to make Hollywood pay! If they thought Bane was bad wait till they see EMO Girl!”
Skrillex followed up his Twitter rant by sending a video, portraying himself as EMO Girl, complete with fake breasts and tight PVC cat suit, to the Los Angeles Police Department. The LAPD have not yet released details of the video’s content although it is believed that an amber alert has been declared in the greater California area.
Mandy Barbosa, a close friend of the DJ and producer, has spoken of the star’s apparent threat, “Sonny (Skrillex) has been acting really weird lately, he’s been talking about vengeance and getting a boob job, really dark stuff! Last week he told me that he wished there was some kind of EMO girl super villain who would self harm and cry until all the evils of the world were drowned by her blood and tears!” she explained nervously, “I thought it was just one of his weird fantasies but obviously it wasn’t. I think he’s just using the whole Batman thing as an excuse to go on a rampage,” she added.
Sources in the Los Angeles underworld have also confirmed that Skrillex has been secretly developing a new genre of Dubstep. It is believed that the bass frequency is so low that listening to it could cause human brains to turn into a gloopy, porridge like, mess.
Amidst fears of musical warfare, the LAPD are said to be actively looking for the deranged EDM celebrity and have issued a warning which states that listening to any music Skrillex has made could be severely harmful to your health.
Whispering Misty
So sorry you can pass up the workshop!