Self-described techno-authority and Beatport Gold Member, 25-year-old VJ/DJ, Alex Tristan, has today wowed the absolute pants off an audience of his immediate peers by performing a zero deck set.
“It was probably the greatest single display of DJing I’ve ever seen, before I watched his set I was ambiguous about the existence of God, not any more,” claimed one witness to Alex’s set. “But He defo exists, was present in that room and probably now wants to become a DJ.”
“I’ve seen people play with four decks, three decks and the industry standard two, but never did I ever think I’d be lucky enough to see a no deck set,” continued the witness who claimed that Alex managed to perform the feat “using just a laptop, there were no decks in sight, I don’t know how it was done”.
“I kept looking around for the decks, thinking how is he playing all my fav bangers without any decks and just a computer?” he continued. “Magic probably.”
“I mean where do the records go?” continued the exasperated witness with religious reverence. “I’ve never been to a DJ show before so have no basis for comparison but that was hands down the best DJ show I’ve ever seen, how did he DJ with his computer? I can only use mine for spreadsheets and playing Minesweeper.”
“When you see the sheer dexterity and talent it takes to operate that laptop you’ll realise that anyone who plays music from a laptop is a musical virtuoso worthy of the highest forms of praise,” he concluded. “If he’s not in the DJ Mag Richest DJ Bangerz list 2016 then there’s no justice in the world and the music world is a poorer place because of it.”
