2 Unlimited Finally Admit – “There Is A Limit”
After years of debate on the subject, 2 Unlimited have finally had to admit that there is a limit, and that they reached it many many years ago. The statement was made whilst one was in a valley which was too deep, whilst the other was on a mountain that was indeed, too high.
The Belgian Duo, most famous for “No Limits,” (in fact only famous for “No Limits,”) have been forced to release the statement due to new laws being passed in Europe which extends libel laws to include inanimate objects and abstract concepts. One valley and one mountain in Europe have sued the pair for libel, claiming that they are “too deep and too high respectively.”
The two members of 2 Unlimited set out some time yesterday to disprove this by attempting to get to the bottom of the valley and the top of the mountain so that they could claim that their famous lyrics were accurate.
However, communication was lost with the pair sometime last night, with no signs of life for over 15 hours now. Some analysts have claimed that even this small fact is proof that there are limits.
“They should have known there were limits to begin with. Can any of you name their second single?” asked the analyst to a silent room at a news conference yesterday. The silence continued until the analyst continued, “Exactly. There are limits. It’s that simple.”
The case has been taken by a German lawyer by the name of Scott Frei, who claims his clients, the mountain and the valley, which live beside each other in the Swiss Alps, have suffered greatly as a result of the slur. He says it is common now for them to have inexperienced climbers scrambling up them from first light, disturbing their carefully arranged scree and generally causing a nuisance.
“2 Unlimited’s reckless use of the phrase ‘No Limits’ has caused trouble all over the world. Not just for my clients, but for an entire generation of ecstasy users who were encouraged to gurn themselves to death whilst chanting the hollow refrain.”
“We’re hoping that this libel case will assure people that, when it comes to drug use, climbing mountains or how many times a past-it’s-best 90s Eurodance act can get away with playing the same song, there are limits,” he concluded.
Thankfully their first single, “Get Ready For This”, prepared everyone for “No Limits.” I can only imagine the chaos that would have ensued had they not warned everyone about the later release.
Not that it matters one iota but Chris Morris did this bit in the 90s. He interviewed them on his radio show asking ‘Is it true that there really are no limits?’