A batch of green ecstasy tablets have been recalled today following reports in Denmark claiming that they have been known to produce unexpected side effects ranging from “smashing things, pumping your chest with your fists and turning green”.
The ecstasy, developed in an underground Amsterdam ecstasy manufacturing plant, are believed to have been exposed to massive doses of gamma radiation which is suspected to have caused the dangerous side effects being witnessed.
Police and witnesses who have dealt with users of the green ecstasy have said that the strange side effects do not begin immediately upon ingesting the pills, but only become manifest when a person under the influence of them suffers emotional distress or anger.
“The people who take the green ecstasy seem fine at first,” claimed a witness. “They come up like you’d normally expect and are peaking within about thirty minutes. It’s only when they suffer distress that the negative side effects take over.”
“So just don’t make them angry,” added the witness. “You wouldn’t like them when they’re angry.”
Police reports in Denmark, where the pills first appeared, describe how people who have taken the green tablets have been known to “bulk up to enormous size while turning green and then flying into a rage” that may last 6 to 8 hours after which time the person will revert back to normal size without any further negative impacts on health.
“After the effects of the drug wears off they’re usually fine,” conclude the witness, “except for some ripped clothes, ruined jeans, a slight headache and no memory of what happened during the time when they were under the influence of the drug…so not totally unlike the aftermath of taking normal ecstasy.”
Police said that the drugs are green and slightly speckled and may be being sold under the street name Green Hulks.
