Gaffe prone trance DJ Tiesto sensationally missed his scheduled performance at Ultra after he managed to get himself locked in a portaloo for 4 hours.
Fans expecting to see Tiesto make his scheduled appearance on Friday were left wondering why the DJ missed his performance, with some believing he may have hit his head again or taken ill from partying in the same way that Avicii and Afrojack had been earlier this week.
Reports coming from Ultra suggest that the missed appearance was the result of a portaloo incident which saw the DJ locked in a toilet in the backstage area for four hours causing him to miss his show.
Sources indicate that Tiesto may have been able to escape from the portaloo had he been able to whistle instead of just “crying and banging on the door”, but reports suggest that the Dutch DJ “can’t whistle”.
Tiesto claims he survived for the four hour ordeal by “drinking soiled water, eating toilet paper and lint from the bottom of his jeans pocket and crying”.
The portaloo which was in the backstage area was apparently locked from the outside by EDM prankster David Guetta who said he didn’t see the problem claiming “If he didn’t show up on stage so what? Just put in the CD, no one’s going to notice.”
“Guetta thought it’d be funny to lock Tiesto in,” claimed a source, “but he then forget about him after needing to do something else uproariously funny with that irrepressible sense of humour of his which he insists totally gets jokes.”
Tiesto apologised profusely to fans, but insisted that his cancellation was unavoidable and says that having had to drink toilet water and sob for several hours means he had a much worse time than they did, despite the fact that he still “earned” $250,000 in the process.
Gold.