A foolish young clubber reportedly “not feeling anything off that pill” has decided to take four more in quick succession.
After taking a tablet of the euphoria inducing street drug while out clubbing with friends, 20-year-old David Harris, from Manchester, said he waited for the usual half an hour or so but still “hadn’t felt a blip, not a fucking tingle” and began to surmise that the pills were weak.
Telling friends that he “wasn’t getting anything off that first one” and insisting that “these eccies are duds” David stupidly took four more “to try get some kind of rush off them”.
“He says he waited for a half hour and wasn’t feeling anything, but it was more like 20 minutes,” claimed a friend of David’s who had to take care of the drooling mess for the rest of the evening when the pills inevitably kicked in. “I’ve got dribbles of spit all down my shoulder from where he was trying to talk in my ear and a vague, unasked for summary of every track the DJ played.”
According to witnesses soon after taking his fourth pill David began to “gurn like a baby eating a lemon” with the rolling eyes of a scared ventriloquist’s dummy with most expecting him to “piss himself in a crumpled heap” at any moment.
“He was sweating and barely moving, like Paul Gascoigne,” chirped a friend. “He was just stood in the middle of the floor trying to stick non-existent skins and having a conversation from the past or a dream he had with imaginary people and the music itself.”
“He’s just been sat in the corner, drinking water and trembling slightly,” claimed one disapproving witness. “Fucking moron. Although he looks like he is having a terrifyingly good time. Terrifying being the optimum word.”
The venue which David attended on that night distanced themselves from the youngsters foolish actions and advised people to wait at least an hour to come up on pills you’re not sure about before taking any more, and to not be a show-off wannabe hero by taking “stupid handfuls of pills”.
