The world reeled from a collective cultural shock today as it was revealed that a tech-house producer has actually made money through streaming website Spotify.
In a world’s first the young bedroom producer, who went to great lengths in purchasing a sample pack of pre-recorded audio loops, has streamed enough copies on Spotify to buy himself a fish and chip supper.
Calvin Cuthbert, who records under the name “Shit Mouse” and has never attended a rave in his life, tells us that making money via Spotify was easy, “I just spent a morning downloading the loops and then took the afternoon to put them together on a cracked version of Ableton”.
Calvin claims that the resulting “track” of barely different loops then got snapped up by Churn Em The Fuck Out Records and was the thousandth release on the label this year.
Churn Em The Fuck Out Records founder Barry Bingewater (45) said that this is great news for “a company which was set up in [his] Mum’s spare room” where he still resides and that with this kind of revenue he should be able to pay his Music Technology nine grand student loan off in the next twenty years.
“The philosophy to the label is simple,” says Barry, “I basically listen to the first 8 bars of any demo sent, and if it contains a kick drum, a hi hat and a snare then it’s getting signed. I am a big believer in the fact if I throw enough dog shit at the wall then at least one dollop will stick and turn to gold.”
“Thankfully, Shit Mouse’s brand of tech house is so ubiquitous that it’s racing up the charts,” he added.
Following his success, Shit Mouse, claims that he is now working on an album titled “Fuck Knows What I’m Doing” that should only take him a day or so to complete and that he is ready to work a solid morning on the layering out of more audio lops from a brand new sample pack he has bought.
Since his debut track Shit Mouse has gained thousands of likes on his Facebook page, mainly from those that he bought himself but this has now led to DJ bookings around the world.
“It’s crazy,” Shit Mouse says, “I have never even touched a set of decks before but apparently there is something called a tractor I can download and sync tracks on and I can obtain other people’s music from Limewire for free, so I am laughing.”
Catch Shit Mouse playing at a flash in the pan tech house night near you soon.
Good work…good work