Festivalgoers across the world have this month begun their annual preparation for summer festival season which will see them getting rained on in a variety of fields.
Reports claims that festival attendees have begun planning in earnest for the season, buying tents, gazebos, wet proof gear and wellies.
“I can’t wait, it’s going to be the best festival season yet, I’ve still got wellies from last year so I’ll be using them,” explained festival fan, Alex Young. “I can’t wait to stand around, moaning about the rain while running under a tent to escape the latest downpour, that’s what festivals are about.”
“My excitement for the festival is only matched by the joy of standing in a field in the pissing rain, willing clouds to go away,” he continued. “I think if I attended a festival and it didn’t rain I’d probably die of shock, but thankfully, that’s never happened.”
“The mud and rain is actually great for your skin,” he lied, “and to be honest, even though you’re getting rained on for 72 hours it’s kinda worth it when you can get back home and have that muck-removing super shower and wank.”
“I was going to buy shorts and suncream, just in case it was sunny,” he concluded, “but then I remembered I still had some unopened from making the same needless preparation last year when again I didn’t even need them.”
