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July 18, 2016
1 min read

Man Urinating On Dance Floor “Really Taking The Piss”

A man who urinated on his local nightclub’s dance floor was “really taking the piss”, according to security staff.

Michael Power, a twenty four year old apprentice electrician, was thrown out of Lucky Larry’s Dance Emporium shortly before midnight on Saturday after relieving himself in the middle of the busy club.

Hair stylist Tracy Nolan claimed she felt “something warm running down the back of her leg” before turning around and spotting Mr Power urinating on the dance floor.

“I was dancing away on the dance floor, minding my own business, when all of a sudden I felt something trickling down my leg,” explained Nolan. “I turned around and there was this little prick, standing there with his lad in his hand, pissing right in the middle of the dance floor.”

“I just screamed, kicked him in the bollox and ran off to try and find a security guard,” continued the traumatised salon employee. “They were great, they grabbed the dirty little fucker, frog marched him to the front doors and threw him out onto the street. He didn’t even have time to get his mickey back in his pants.”

Head doorman Barry Brown also spoke to Wunderground, “We had a pretty quiet weekend, there were no major incidents apart from one lad who went to the toilet on the dance floor. He was really taking the piss so we chucked him out and hit him with a four week ban.”

According to eye witnesses, there was “piss everywhere” after the security guard grabbed Mr Power mid-piss and the dance floor area “smelled even worse than usual”.

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