In a strange development, Ibiza’s nightclub owners have agreed to float drink prices on the stock exchange and let the market decide drink prices for the upcoming season.
According to the Ibiza Club Owners Association, or the ICOA, floating drink prices is the only way to ensure that drinks remain at a fair and profitable price in the current economic climate.
Wunderground spoke to an Ibiza club owner, who wishes to remain anonymous, about the new pricing structure, “As a club owner, I definitely think that drink prices in Ibiza clubs are far too low. There are so many costs to take into consideration when running a club, most of the time we’re lucky to break even, if it wasn’t for ridiculously high drink prices we wouldn’t make a penny.”
“So, we’re taking a bit of a risk by letting the markets decide what the drink prices will be here next season,” continued the unnamed club owner. “If it was up to me, drinks would be two or three times more expensive than they already are. The danger with letting the markets decide is that they could plummet, we might end up having to sell our drink for as little as three hundred times its wholesale price.”
“People always say we’re greedy but that’s not the truth at all,” he continued defensively. “Sure, we stuff the walls of our clubs with money, but that’s just because it gets very cold here in the winter and money happens to be a great insulator, not because we’re money hungry whores who like to take advantage of holiday makers by putting them in extremely hot, overcrowded rooms where the only hydration is extortionately priced beverages, that’s just crazy.”
Reports from stock exchange sources suggest that insider trading patterns have already been spotted around the drinks industry, making it very likely that drink prices in Ibiza could soar over the off season months.
