Steve Aoki has announced that he is to scrap his plans to be cryogenically frozen after doctors confirmed they will not be able to freeze any cake.
Earlier this year, Aoki announced that he would attempt to be frozen until doctors had discovered a cure for his music but the Miami native will now have to explore other options.
“It’s a total disaster,” the DJ told Wunderground earlier today. “I really want to be frozen but I’m not willing to go without any cake. Who knows how long it will take doctors to develop a cure for my music? It could take hundreds, thousands or even millions of years and there’s no guarantee that cake will be around that far into the future.”
“I just don’t think I can live in a world without cake,” continued Aoki, best known for having his pubic hair transplanted onto his face in an attempt to have a beard. “Especially not if I’m cured of my music. What would I do all day? I’d literally have nothing, I’d have to resort to talking to people and I really don’t have the social skills for that kind of thing.”
Wunderground also spoke to Joseph Reezer, a professor of cryogenics, “Cake is a far too simple substance to survive to cryogenic process,” he explained. “The process puts the tissue under all sorts of pressure, there is no way cake could possibly survive it. If he liked to throw bowling balls or rocks at people he could bring them but definitely not cake.”
“At this point, if Mr Aoki isn’t willing to be frozen without cake, he should spend the money he would have spent on his cryogenics on finding a cure for his music.”
According to medical experts, Aoki would be better off investing his money into developing a cryogenically freezable cake because there is no, and never will be, a cure for his music.
